Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

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A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

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What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

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A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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no

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What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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View Terms of Service

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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