how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no legs.

What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

How come grilled cheese?

wsde

noah is a scrub jungle

red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

A baby seal walks into a club.

hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

What has eyes but cannot see? A blind man.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

How do you identify a Chinese tank? They smash their own people.

What is 9+10? 19

Why did Mike Tyson say he would eat his children? Thats mean! friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Why not just vi0late them REALLY REALLY FUCKlNG HARD! Its a Win/Win/Win/Sore ass situation.

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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