How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know but you're a sick person even thinking about it.

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Dude! That movie was so gay! It had a bunch of naked men having sex with other naked men!

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "what is this, some kind of joke?!"

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Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops