What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

david give me my money back... i will have it next week

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

why was the boy crying he had cancer

Knock Knock. Who`s there? The police, your family were killed in a bakery A German bakery.

Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

whats the difference between a baby and a puppy? i care when the puppy dies....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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