FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

What do you get when you mix a baby and chemical waste? A bad smoothie.

What does a dyslexic person do on sundays? Goes to church to pray to Dog

Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

Ebola

What's the difference between a banana and a monkey? They're both yellow, except the monkey

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

Hats better than a stick? A stone

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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