Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

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I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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andrew wagner

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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So Nero, seriously, don't be mean, call me, I am going to bed now, nighty nite.

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

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A man was shot. He died.

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What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

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Barbara Streisand

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What is the difference between Joe Paterno and Coach Sundusky? Nothing. They are both terrible human beings and should thoroughly punished for their actions/inactions and should serve time in prison.

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops