What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

why did the two girls fight? Because they were mad at eachother.

How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

Get Outta Here We're Closed!

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

James Patrick Campbell

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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