Q; How did the blind man cross the road? A; very unsuccessfully leaving behind memories of his joys but soon forgotten smile

how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

Knock knock Who's there? Hi would you be interested in learning about Scientology? No

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Ready for something funny? nothing

How do you get a blonde out of a tree? Shoot her in the head.

edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

25

Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

Question: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Answer: Being raped by a giant scorpion.

Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

How do you piss off a blind person? Tell him to piss in a round room.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...