What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

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Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

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Yo mama is so fat... she died due to type two diabetes.

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How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

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Penis

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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4 hours later.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

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Whats the difference between Justin bieber and a dick... The dick

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

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Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

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How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

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I love pissing people off :P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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