Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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What did the giraffe say to the other? nothing giraffes cant talk

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White men's rights

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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A woman is carried out of a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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yes i can connor, this is brett.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

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What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

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What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops