A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

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Sarah Jessica Parker

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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what did the cripple, the cancer guy, the blonde, and the blackguy have in common they all have no reason to live

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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whats worse than worldwarII world war iii

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Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

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People are a lot like slinkies. Not really good for anything, but still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Roses are black violets are black We are all black?! SHIT IM COLOUR BLIND

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So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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