Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

There is a 5 second long and extremely depressing video, most cant watch it for any longer than 6 seconds

"The Civil War wasn't won in a day, it was won in a lifetime." -Marc Cruz

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

Anti-jokes are funny.

"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

What hurts like hell? HELL

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

Your Mother

Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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