I read the terms of service.

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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nobody move, or i'll kill myself, then her!

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

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fuck you you punkass piece of shit I hope you burn in my uncle's titties and ass rape yourself while screaming "make it stop!'. Then, I hope that you take a titanic needle and shove it up your lower kidney until it tears open and all your bodily fluids spill out into an ocean of shit. Also, I have 73 balls with a ballsack for each ball. So, I have 73 ballsacks.

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Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

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What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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