what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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How old is your mom Dead

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What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

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What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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Why did a Jewish man have no hair left? He recently got a haircut.

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Q: What did the shark say while eating the surfer A: Nothing, his mouth was full, and besides....sharks cannot talk.

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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The dinosaurs aren't really extinct. Just kidding.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

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A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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