Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. Well, at least she thinks she did.

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Penis

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

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Jews

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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Black guys shoot. White guys have small penises. Black guys steal. White guys have keep money. Black guys are broke. That's what she said.

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You mothers so ghetto, you died.

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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