- Anti Joke

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

Have you ever seen what Stevie Wonder looks like without his sunglasses? Neither have I.

Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

Neil is a reterd.

Wanna see some more?

You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

What did the priest do to the little crying boy in an enclosed room? He forgave the boy for his sins. Then he raped him.

What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

You know what's catchy? A cold

pudding

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

What do you call an elephant on the moon? Dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? ........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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