Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

Yo momma so fat you have aids

What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

once upon a time there was a boy

What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

Yeah, so I was partially right when I assumed that you joined the feds in order to make sure the past would not repeat itself huh? The underground society never broke a simple rule, a single law, it simple grew from a bunch of dopeheads, to people capable of creating nuclear weapons... Just a matter of speaking of course.

A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

What does a black person use to chop a tree down? An Ask.

What do you call a black priest who's name is John? Father John

A guy walks into the bar and orders a coke with some ice and some peanuts. It cost a total of $4.00 plus tax. He gave the bartender $5.00 and told him to keep the change. He drank the soda pop and burped loudly and left the bar and forgot his peanuts.

What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

Get on your knees Ho

IMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM a beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee immmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmiiiiooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooodfssgihsfdiug

What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

what do you call a rat with wings? an evolutionary masterpiece

Why did the black person cross the road? Because the street light turned green

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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