A man walks into bar and orders a drink. The bartender says " Hey I saw a bunch of men coming in and out of your house while you were on vacation last week." The man replied " I know. That's because my wife is a prostitute."

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

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Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

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Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

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Why did the teacher give out homework? she is a teacher

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"your momma's so fat that she died in her sleep last night," said the doctor. "There was nothing we could do."

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We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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What happens when two jews meet in the bus ? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's not worth telling a joke about that.

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What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

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4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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