i'm funny

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why are asians eyes so slanted? because THEY WERE BORN THAT WAY!!!

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How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

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Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

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A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf a bread

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because the light said don't walk

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What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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Anthony Dephillips is handsome

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Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

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Kelly Clarkson

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

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Woman rights.

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Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

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TWIX PAUSE!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

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Blonde: I'm sad. Brunette: Why? Blonde: I walked into a bar just to see my boyfriend having a drink with another woman, Brunette: I'm so sorry,

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is blue too

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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