what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

thumb_up thumb_down +42

69

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

thumb_up thumb_down +42

knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What is better than a cat? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you make a builder sad? You shit on his bricks.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your penis tastes like shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q. What did the blak guy say to the other black guy? A. Hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

thumb_up thumb_down +34

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A Panda walks into a bar and orders a drink, he then shoots the bartender and leaves. The people are shocked and the panda is arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops