Why did Dom stop smoking He didnt I lied

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

YOLO.

A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

Q: What's big, brown, and smell like crap? A: Turd.

What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

Pee Pee bleekkka klup look? fupapapapapapapapap

Why did the man walk into the bar? Because he wasn't looking where he was going

Knock Knock. Who's there? The IRS. You didn't pay your taxes so we have to take you to jail.

They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

What do you call a dancing panda bear? I'm not sure, but panda bears are pretty big, so the possibility of them dancing is highly unlikely.

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

Q: How many years does it take for a deer to grow into a moose? A: 7

Single man, interested in women. Profession: Particle Physicist. Looking for: A strong interaction with a strange, charming woman. One who will ride both up and down the roller-coaster of a relationship, that is not fussy about being top or bottom and that is not impartial to the many flavours of life. I look forward to you spinning me around; Yours Sub-atomically, Professor Quark.

What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? bullshit!!

What happened to the boy who lost his arm? He got on suprisingly well in life considering he has the use of only one arm, and got a terrific job. He managed to meet a woman, , and he was a generally happy guy. He lived to a great age, and he, nor anyone around him, ever thought of him as different or disabled. It's good to hear a happy anti joke once in a while isn't it guys?

A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

Gorden Brown.

Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

Toaster

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...