How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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What happened to the boy who lost his arm? He got on suprisingly well in life considering he has the use of only one arm, and got a terrific job. He managed to meet a woman, , and he was a generally happy guy. He lived to a great age, and he, nor anyone around him, ever thought of him as different or disabled. It's good to hear a happy anti joke once in a while isn't it guys?

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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A Knock, Knock B There's no door. What are you knocking on?

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So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

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So an Indian walks into a bar and says: ? ?? ??? ?????? ??? ??? ? ??? ??? ??????

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How do you make a baby float? Take your foot of its head.

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Think of your favorite joke. Thats so weird! Thats exactly the same as this joke!

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why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

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A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station . . .

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What came first -- the chicken or the egg roll?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? -Because all races like fried chicken.

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What's worse than not finding your true love in high school? Dying

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What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

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Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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