What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

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Women's rights

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Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

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How old is your mom? Old.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

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Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

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2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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What do you call a person at your door? Whatever his name happens to be.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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