Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

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Male penises.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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Why can't you tell Knock-Knock jokes in a Japanese farmhouse? Because your fist will go through the rice paper.

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Guy 1: "Hey do you want to hear a joke?" Guy 2: "Sure" Guy 1: "No."

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

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a person smokes weed... and gets high

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they say that if you commit suicide, you have done nothing wrong. does that mean hitler did nothing wrong?

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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