Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will cause me to develop a drinking problem.

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Whats hotter than the sun? Larger stars.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

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In the movie Inception, what does the man do after he thinks about calling out to his children so he could see them one last time? The man calls out to his children.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

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Roses are red Violets are twisted bend over now your about to get fisted

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Sally with prosthetic arms.

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

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Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

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Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

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A:Knock Knock, B:Who's There? A:Orange, B:Orange Who? A:Orange Banana.

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is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One No One Who? ...

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If life throws you melons... ouch

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whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

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Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

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Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

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A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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whats worse than forgetting to buy cinnamon toast crunch at the grocery store? Getting beat to death with a gallon of rotten milk...

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GONNA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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