A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Yes" the man replies, because he is aware that the bartender wasn't actually asking if the day way long, but rather if the day was hard.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow Jones.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

water, hydrated silica, glycerin, sorbitol, PVM/MA copolymer, sodium lauryl sulfate, flavor, cellulose gum, sodium hydroxide, propylene glycol, carrageenan, sodium saccharin, titanium dioxide all adds up to colgate. SO AS A MATTER OF FACT, CHEESE PLUS PIE IS CHICKEN. CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I LIKE SAYING CHEESE, JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL BECAUSE THEY WERE BAGELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the difference between a Black man and a White man Skin color and possibly many other things because that is reasonable and normal.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many dead kittens can you fit into a trunk? -19

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

If life gives you lemons, Eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's faster than a black man with a TV? Light.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

THIS IS an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse than 3 black people? 4 Black people

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black guy flying a helicopter? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An Irish man walked into a bar. He turned to the bartender and said hello. Then walked to the back booth for his lunch meeting with the heads of his highly profitable company and then went home.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops