how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

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Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

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T-Dog scare me

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

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what do you call a 2-foot blue scottishman named max? max

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why did the little girl fall off the swing. she had no arms so I pushed her off

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A priest and a prostitute are sitting next to each other on a bus. The priest asks her what she does, and she says "I sell my body to strange men." The priest then explains to her about Christianity, and she gives up her ways and becomes a devout Christian.

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one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

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This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Six and seven are numbers, and cannot feel emotions such as fear.

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When a suicide-bomber when to heaven what did Allah give him apart from 72 virgins? 72 mothers in law.

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Roses are red voilets are blue,you are gay so fuck you,!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

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why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

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how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

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Your momma is so fat, that her doctor recommended that she goes on a diet in order to prevent early death caused by a heart problem.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

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Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

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Why do women wear deodorant and makeup? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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