what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

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Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

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yfygcugyuyc

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A: B: No pun intended.

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Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

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Robert supra not deep throwing kaleb law wrench

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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So I was eating pancakes in my driveway...or were they waffles?

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A brown haired girl and a blonde girl are driving through a cornfield. Because of this illegal activity, they are sent to court and given 8 years in the state prison.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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Whats worst than a worm in you apple? 2 worms in your apple. Whats worst than two worms in your apple? An apple in your Worm. Whats worst than that? I don't know plenty of international tragedies such as plane crashes, and please don't say the holocaust. I was going to say 2 apples in your worm.

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What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

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i died. new product by steve jobs. also presenting icoffin, and next year icoffin 2. slightly slimmer with a lock button to keep zombies out.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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