What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

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A marine biologist is captured by a group of violent pirates. After hours of being tortured, the pirates make him walk the plank. As he is pushed on to the plank, they ask him for his one last request. He responds "Kill yourselves." The pirates proceed to stab themselves until they bleed out and the marine biologist is the last man on the boat.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

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Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

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What's Casey Anthony doing now that she's not in prison? She's actually living life as an upstanding citizen in Florida.

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Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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no

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Why was the black man put in jail? Because he escaped.

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Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names...

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I saw a mexican drowning and saved him... as my screensaver ;)

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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Why did was micheal jackson named micheal jackson? because his was

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Lots of things. Life isn't all about you, you know.

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knock knock who's there police

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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