Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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a man walks into a bar it hurt

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Knock Knock *no answer* Knock Knock *Genevieve enters the house with curiosity and is later charged with Breaking and Entering*

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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Why did the girl die? No one knows.

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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