Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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Jake Bowar

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Blarg

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What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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What's worse than hearing another Holocaust anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

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Woman's rights.

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What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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