How did bob Marley quit doing Drugs?

Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

Dear Board of education, so are we.

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

What did the turkey call the chicken? Nothing, turkeys can't speak, idiot.

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

.""-. |a a \ \ / | '-') ; _/ /_ .'/ ; '. / / |'. \ | | '._\ | | | | | \ \_ _.// jgs '._`""`_.' `""`

Three children are celebrating Christmas, Joey got a toy train, Janey got a barbie doll, Know what Jimmy got??? Cancer.

poo poo you you doo doo too too

What happened to the man that jump out of the airplane with no parachute? He landed on a baby and both died almost instantly. The authorities were called and they took care of the situation flawlessly.

I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

What do you call it when Chuck Norris gambles? Chuck Norris does not gamble. That would imply the chance of losing.

guy 1: hey, i got a new dog. isn't he cute? guy 2: i just lit him on fire

What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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