If there are 500 bricks in an airplane and one falls out how many are there in he plane? 499. Name 3 steps to get a Elephant in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2. Put the Elephant in the fridge 3. Close the fridge Name 4 steps to get an Deer in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2.Take the Elephant out of the fridge 3. Put the Deer in the fridge 4. Close the fridge The Lion King is having a birthday party. Every animal came, besides one. Who was it? The Deer. Because hes trapped in the Fridge. The Deer manages to escape the fridge, and hes running late. he encounters Crocodile lake. How will he cross it? He will swim through it because the Crocodiles are at the Lion Kings birthday. Then suddenly, The Deer dies. How? The Brick hit him.

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

an amosh person used an electrical appliance

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who took a shit in my garden?

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

don't look behind you

Your mom is so old so will die soon.

How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

Can you see this brett? Connor

whats better than 24................. 25

why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

Period Blood

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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