A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's Worse then an apple with a worm? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

thumb_up thumb_down -94

"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

thumb_up thumb_down +71

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Knock knock (No one is home)

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down +47

- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops