What do you call a guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub? A guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

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You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

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Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

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whos gay? you are

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Q:What kind of pizza did the World Trade Center order? A:Two Plains

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Roses are black, violets are black, i am blind!

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie pop? It very depending on the amount of saliva produced in ones mouth..

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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Q: What did the casual mathematician discover at the end of his vivid rainbow of dreams (Question mark- key`s screwed) A: Enough dirt to fill 3141592+ treasure chests to the brim.

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I'm Schizophrenic and so am I

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OGC - tilt your head

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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Once upon a time.

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It says so on your cap.

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How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

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What's worse than 100 babies tied to a tree. 1 baby tied to 100 trees

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Why did Susie fall off a swing? She had an inner ear infection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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