Hello I'm a fat kid

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No

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What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

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What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean

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Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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ur mother

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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GAY PEOPLE

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A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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