Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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