Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...