A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

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AIDS

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

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why was sally bleeding? they never buy band-aids over her nubs.

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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Albert <3 Hunter

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why couldn't the child with down syndrome zip up their jacket.... it was a button jacket ... you asshole

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Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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What did your mom say when Quinn Griffith Randel walked in the door? Hi.

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Wanna hear a good joke? Sure. So does Hellen Keller

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Knock Knock Whose there? Its John

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Why couldn't Billy drive? He had no arms. Why did he have no arms? Thalidomide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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