What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Female Orgasms

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

Faithful men.

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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