Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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What do you call a girl with one leg? Eileen

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How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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