What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

What tastes worse than dog shit? White dog shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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