Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

There once was a man from Peru, Whose limericks all stopped on line two.

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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