WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says that there are no dogs allowed, but the man says that he is blind. So the man sits down with his dog and asks for a drink. The bartender decided to check to see if he was really blind, so he says, " Hey, do you know what time it is?" The blind man replies, "7 o'clock," The bartender says, "Ha! You said you were blind! Get out of..." but was interrupted by the man, who promptly said, "No, I'm deaf," and left.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops