Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man, and an American man are all on a plane in-flight when the pilot screams over the intercom, "We are two pounds over weight! The plane is going down unless you all throw off useless things that have no value in your countries!" The Chinese man throws out a pair of chopsticks and an egg roll and says, "I have too many of those in my country." The Mexican does the same with a taco and sombrero, repeating, "I have too many of those in my country." The American looks around his items pondering what things are too common in the USA. He locks his eyes on the Mexican. The other passengers are shocked as the American throws off a hamburger and a football.

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Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

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Why doesn't Batman exist? Because he was made up.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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