What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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ever tried african food? they neither

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

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How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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