Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

thumb_up thumb_down +6

13 =B you just learned something

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

gingers

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant. Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops