Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was stapled to the head of a penis that belonged to an asian man

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

WHO'S YO DADDY? the man who's semen combined with your mother's egg to create a child.

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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