What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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someone called someone else a frog

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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civil rights

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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