What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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