Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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96

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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NEVER

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

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a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded at sea,the brunette swims 1 quarter of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns.The redhead swims 3 quarters of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns. The blonde swims half the way to shore, gets tired and swims back.

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Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

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Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

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your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

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What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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