A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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