-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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