What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats green and lives in the water

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was Allen late for work? He was mauled by a bear. Allen is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

12 in general

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is your name? My name is Jeff

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops