A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

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What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

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DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

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Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

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A black man and a Mexican man are both in a car. Who's driving? The white man who is also in the car with them.

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

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two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

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why didnt the girl laugh at the joke? because it wasnt funny

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An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

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wsde

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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